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Shadow Part

by Dark Cloud Sunshine

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1.
Clouds 04:54
Looking up to the sky for the answers. Looking up to those shapes for the answers. I don’t believe in heaven and I don’t believe in hell. It leaves me in a strange place and I’m not doing so well. Looking up to the sky for the answers. Looking up to those shapes for the answers. Seeing the clouds move, changing shape, exposing different spaces. Unlike the immoveable pattern that perpetuates in my life. I don’t believe in heaven and I don’t believe in hell. It leaves me in a strange place and ‘m not doing so well. Looking up to the clouds for the answers. Looking up to those shapes for the answers. Watching the unpredictable forms Like echoes of life. I don’t believe in heaven and I don’t believe in hell. It leaves me in a strange place and I’m not doing so well.
2.
Wash it Down 03:32
Swallow another pill, Swallow another mouthful of booze. Wash it down, so it might lift you up, Wash it down , so it doesn’t bring you down Wash it down, so that you might for forget. To get by on this day again. Swallow another insult, Swallow another thoughtless comment, Swallow another love loss, Swallow being ignored again. Wash it down so, it might lift you up, Wash it down, so it doesn’t bring you down, Wash it down, so that you might forget. To get by on this day again Bubbling under, bubbling inside, Feel the waves, the burning, the yearning and the churning. Wash It down so, it might lift you up, Wash it down, so it doesn’t bring you down, Wash it down, so that you might forget. To get by on this day again.
3.
She came home with the smell of outdoors on her big coat. She was so happy and she beamed a smile. She told little brother and me that we were going to be three, a little brother or sister for you. She squeezed us both so tightly. In a cheery red coat she stood, in a cherry red coat she stood. She grew so large and uncomfortable. Due time ran over and she was rushed away. But when she came home without a brother or sister, her inner beam had gone out. She was in a daze. In a cherry red coat she stood, in a cherry red coat she stood. Her days were now empty, even though she had us two. But the bitter sweet memories of her happiness and sadness, comeback with the smell of outdoors on a big coat. In a cherry red coat she stood, in a cherry red coat she stood. And she was so happy.
4.
There are lots of beautiful people walking around today. It is strange how they seem so far away. Today has a late crisp summer shimmer, on its way to meet the turn of the autumn. September has set in and I have passed another birthday. Late summer shimmer, illuminate my life. Sparkle in my face and blind me in my shades. It’s an opportunity for the beautiful people to show off some of their flesh. It may be the last time this year, as the warm coats beckon and the buttons fasten. But the autumn light it will still shine and the shades they will stay on. Late summer shimmer, illuminate my life. Sparkle in my face and blind me in my shades. It all looks like the good life today, as the idyll intensifies the scene. Late summer shimmer, illuminate my life. Sparkle in my face and blind me in my shades.
5.
We can’t help who we fall in love with, It can be so cruel and so sad. And so tragic as it has been for you. As it has been for both of you. There’s an old song playing on the radio. It inevitably reminds me of you, It’s not even a song that I like that much, but it makes me think of you, When I hear it, when I hear it. I can see your haunted face, the images all etched in, All jumbled, so unkind, It doesn’t hide when your soul is on the surface. There’s an old song playing on the radio. It inevitably reminds me of you, It’s not even a song that I like that much, but it makes me think of you, When I hear it, when I hear it. The story of our friend’s death, Recounted by you, Haunts my own mind now too, I can’t help thinking of your face, With your soul on the surface. There’s an old song playing on the radio, It inevitably reminds me of you, It’s not even a song that I like that much, but it makes me think of you, When I hear it, when I hear it.
6.
So Scared 04:14
I am anticipating a catalogue of death. I don’t know how to deal with it. No-one tells us, we might face this. But I am waiting and I am scared. And I’m so scared, I’m so scared, I am so scared. I’ve got aging parent’s, my wife is older than me. Most of my family are still around. I ask myself, how will I help them. I ask myself, how will they survive. And I’m so scared, I’m so scared, I’m so scared. I am not so young myself I am in fear of poor health. I have never made much money. I wonder who will take care of them. I wonder who will take care of me. And I’m so scared, I’m so scared, I’m so scared, I’m so scared.
7.
Sat Listening, to the cool sounds, of Miles Davis. As I kill time, drinking coffee again. It’s a pick me up, as I look to my day ahead. The days go by, the days they go by. The days go by, the days they go by. Without a thought of just how precious they really are. I have got a lust for life, and it has come quite late. But not too late I hope. I have started to see beauty in what I thought might have been ugly before. The days go by, the days they go by. The days go by, the days they go by. Without the thought of just how precious they really are. All the time that I have now seems a waste, if I don’t make use of it. The days go by, the days they go by. The days go by, the days they go by. Without a thought of just how precious they really are.
8.
Scent 04:52
She smells like macaroons, and she looks like a raccoon. Don’t cry, don’t cry I say. So soft and so sweet, she looks so desperately at me. Those tears come from deep inside, some hurt from long ago. She looks so beautiful to me, she looks so beautiful to me. I have put my foot in it and brought it all back up. And even though I know it’s not down to me, I can feel her pain. She looks so beautiful to me, she looks so beautiful to me. She smells like macaroons and she looks like a raccoon. She smells like macaroons and she looks like a raccoon. I adore her nakedness in all of its forms because she smells like macaroons and she looks like a raccoon. She looks so beautiful to me, she looks so beautiful to me.
9.
Standing under the shower. I am thinking of some loving people. I am thinking of Mark Linkous and his beautiful songs. So sad they are but so right there. His voice can bring me to tears. Certain songs I can hardly listen to without shedding them. I am thinking of his last moments of despair now. How lonely he must have felt. My tears are streaming in the shower now. My body shakes under the water. How comforting those songs have been to me over the years. You were so beautiful in your sensitive performances. It hurts me when I think I won’t see you again. On stage. Loneliness, loneliness, keeps knocking at my door. Loneliness, loneliness keeps tugging at my heart.
10.
Approaching another birthday, they have started to become unwanted. That old cliché, it’s another year, closer to death. I have to say, that I never imagined I would have this attitude when I reached this point. But then again, I never thought I would get here. It’s not that I hate growing old, because I love the wisdom that can come with it. But there is so much I still want to do and know. The whole things still feels painful to me, but I keep on, wanting to say something. There is something that drives me and it’s not keep on smiling. I don’t believe, that age should restrict you from doing undone things. Citing another cliché, it’s never too late and you are only as old as you feel. It’s the cliché song, it’s the cliché song, and its coming for you.
11.
So I turn to the last page, I realise I don’t want it to end. I look at my options and wonder where it will take me next, this journey that is my story. And it’s need to continue regardless; is somehow writing itself.

about

The collection of songs that make up this album were recorded in 'Lockdown' on a portastudio. The lyrics are a mixture of old and new, that are reflections on life and death, often focusing on bitter sweet memories of moments of joy, bereavement and observations. Many musical influences have surfaced during the making of the album that give it a diverse feeling. The album was compiled as if it might have been a vinyl record, so if the listener thinks of tracks 1 - 5 as side one and tracks 6 - 11 as side two, it may serve to make sense of the narrative.

credits

released October 30, 2020

All guitars, percussion and vocals: Steven Foy
Additional vocals on Late Summer Shimmer and When I Hear It: Rosie Eaglen
Beats: Drum machine.
Recorded and engineered by Steven Foy, assisted by Rosie Eaglen

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Dark Cloud Sunshine Ramsgate, UK

Steven Foy is a visual artist who has exhibited in the UK, Europe and the USA. He was the one time drummer with the Manchester grunge outfit, Tunnel Frenzies, in the early 1990s. More recently he has been the co-songwriter and guitar player with the duo/band Rugosa Hips. The project, Dark Cloud Sunshine materialized at the beginning of 'Lockdown' from both old and new self-penned lyrics. ... more

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